The Plus One Theory

Episode 18: Embracing Your Story: The Power of Plus One

• Pam Dwyer • Season 1 • Episode 18

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The Plus One Theory podcast explores how taking one additional step, one more act of kindness, patience, or strength, creates powerful change over time despite life's challenges and unfairness.

• Everyone carries stories of heartbreak, healing, and survival that are worth sharing
• Writing and sharing authentic stories can inspire others and create meaningful connections
• Shame keeps us stuck, healing comes from naming our pain and taking action
• Implement the Plus One Theory through journaling, therapy, speaking up, and self-forgiveness
• Burnout often comes from putting energy into the wrong things rather than doing too much
• Focus energy on building what matters, healing what hurts, and loving who shows up
• Stories don't need perfect endings, they need authenticity and vulnerability
• The Plus One challenge: take one step toward reclaiming energy and offer grace to yourself

Join our monthly book giveaway and Chapter Chatter Book Club at PamDwyerSpeaker.com, where we feature discussions with the authors themselves.


Be a Guest on The Plus One Theory Podcast!

Are you someone who believes in the power of kindness, resilience, and intentional growth? Do you have a story about how small, meaningful steps have made a difference in your life or career?

I’d love to invite you to share your journey on The Plus One Theory Podcast!

This podcast is all about exploring how we can apply the Plus One Theory to create ripples of positivity and purpose in our personal and professional lives. I’m especially excited to feature guests who work in heart-centered careers—nurses, teachers, counselors, nonprofit leaders, caregivers, or anyone who dedicates their energy to helping others.

Your story could inspire listeners who are navigating their own challenges and looking for ways to take that next small step forward. Whether you’ve used kindness to overcome adversity, found strength in vulnerability, or applied intentional action to make an impact in your community, I want to hear from you!

Interested? Here’s How to Reach Out:

  • Email me with a brief introduction about yourself and your story.
  • Let me know how the Plus One Theory has played a role in your life or career.

Let’s work together to inspire others and create a ripple effect of kindness and resilience. I can’t wait to hear your story!

Share this with someone who inspires you...

Speaker 1:

Well, hello friends, welcome back to the Plus One Theory podcast. I'm your host, pam Dwyer, and I'm so glad you're here today. If this is your first time listening, let me quickly explain the plus one theory. It's this idea that when you've done your best, you take just one more small step, one more act of kindness, one more moment of patience and one more ounce of strength when you feel like giving up. That plus one might seem small in the moment, but over time it creates big, powerful change. And before we begin, let me just give you a quick disclaimer.

Speaker 1:

I'm not a therapist, psychologist or medical professional. Everything I share on this podcast comes from personal experience my own healing journey and the incredible stories of others who are just trying to be better every day. Think of this as a safe place for growth, encouragement and honest conversation. So let's dive into today's episode, because this one is really close to my heart. Because this one is really close to my heart. So everyone you meet is carrying something A story of heartbreak, a story of healing, a story of survival and a story that they're still in the middle of. Everyone has a story. That's my point and that's why I'm also writing my next book, the Plus One Theory, not just to share more of my stories, but to invite others to share theirs.

Speaker 1:

I want to feature people who've lived through something painful or hard or just made a choice, whether they realized it or not, to use the Plus One Theory To take one more step, one more act of healing or kindness and keep moving forward. And how they did that. You may think, pam, I don't have that kind of story, but you do. You really do. If you've lived, if you've loved, if you've been broken and got back up again, then you have a story worth sharing, and someone out there needs to hear it. I promise you that's what I've realized in writing my book From the Piney Woods. At first it started out as just my journal notes and then it turned into well, maybe I'll write a book and share the story with some people that you know might find it interesting. But you know what happened? People are actually getting inspired and touched and motivated to do better things in their lives. You know, take a few seconds to see the unseen. So there was a bigger plan for this story and you have a story, too, that can make the same impact.

Speaker 1:

So, as I've been searching for stories for this new book of mine, I've met some of the most incredible people, people who've been through unimaginable pain yet still show up with kindness, courage and resilience. I can't wait for you to read their stories, because they will inspire you the way so many people have inspired me throughout my journey. You see, every time something horrible happened in my life and I've had many things happen someone would come along and offer me just enough light to keep me going. It was never a grand gesture, it was encouragement, it was someone believing in me, someone that saw me. It was kindness, grace or support, showing up exactly where I needed it most of the darkest chapters in my life. And no, it doesn't mean I'll never struggle again. Life is life and life is not fair right. It will always throw something at us, but I know now from experience that we can overcome adversity, especially when we surround ourselves with people who remind us of our strength. When we forget we have it. That's the power of story, that's the power of connection, and that's exactly what this podcast and my next book is all about.

Speaker 1:

So I want to talk a little bit about shame. Okay, let's talk about shame for a second, because shame and guilt will keep us stuck if we let them. Some of us are carrying shame for what we've done, or some for what we didn't do, and some for things that were done to us. But here's the truth Healing doesn't come from stuffing it down. It comes from naming it. You got to name it and take action.

Speaker 1:

The plus one theory. There are some steps that you can take to implement the plus one theory, and this is what I recommend. Number one you've got to write the first line of your story in a journal. I know y'all hear me say it all the time, but journaling will change your life. I promise, just try it. I mean, why not just try it out? Do like commit to two weeks of journaling every single day, even if it's just a couple of sentences, you know. And then, at the end of that two weeks, read over your notes. You'll see patterns and you'll you probably forgot how you were feeling two weeks ago. We all do, and that's why we got a journal.

Speaker 1:

Make a therapy appointment. Go to counseling If you have an issue that is causing havoc in your life and you just aren't coping well. Well, that's what therapists do. They give us coping skills. They can't make everything go away, but they can teach us how to cope with what's happening.

Speaker 1:

Speak up when your voice shakes. You know what I mean by that. I mean, I don't know if you've ever had this happen, but if I have some sort of confrontation with someone, my voice just gets so shaky. It's like when I think the other person thinks I'm scared. I'm not scared, I'm just very full of emotion and I'm confronting something that hurt me or is causing an issue. But when my voice shakes, that just reminds me that I am human and I do have emotions. And it's okay if your voice shakes.

Speaker 1:

But you still need to speak up and forgive yourself. That's the final one and the most important, I think. Forgive yourself for something you've carried way too long. You know it can get really heavy inside of you and start turning you into a person you're not. Forgiveness matters to you, not just the other people that you're forgiving. They aren't getting off easy. They still have their own lives to contend with. But when you release it, it's a whole new game. It's a whole new energy.

Speaker 1:

So, speaking of energy, let's talk about some energy of intention, because burnout isn't always about doing too much. Sometimes it's about putting our energy into the wrong things. I've learned the hard way that if I spend all my time worrying about what others think about my journey, what they should be feeling, what they're not saying, how they're not supporting me, I will wear myself out emotionally and spiritually and then I am not a good writer, I am not a good storyteller. So I have to really be careful where I put my energy and I really try to pour it into good things good, kind, compassionate, vulnerable things and I think that's really what makes me a great storyteller. So it's important that you assess your energy and where it's going.

Speaker 1:

Let me give you an example. When I I mean, I don't know about you, but when I get behind the wheel and I go out into traffic and someone cuts me off or cuts in line, I get so angry and they don't even know it, they don't even feel it, they don't know it, they don't care. So I'm pouring all my energy into this anger. That is accomplishing nothing. So now just remember that, try to remember it and save that energy for something good, like being kind at my next appointment or, I don't know, opening the door for someone or just remembering to be kind, because that takes positive energy light. So the reality most people are just trying to survive their own chaos, their own worlds, and that's why we have to shift from external validation to internal grounding and you should be using your energy to build what matters to you and heal what hurts and love who shows up, and then you let the rest go. Because those three things building what matters, healing what hurts and loving who shows up well, that makes the world go round.

Speaker 1:

So why am I writing this book, the Plus One Theory? Well, my next book isn't just mine, it's everyone's. I'm actually in the process of trying to find a few more real-life stories to put in the book. So if you think you have a grand story, it doesn't even have to be grand, I just want it to be real. And I would love for the story to inspire, motivate, educate you know, if you have a cause or something you want to bring attention to, what a stage to do that.

Speaker 1:

I want it to feature real people who've used the plus one theory in their own lives. You don't have to have a perfect ending, you don't have to be famous or a fancy pants, as we say in East Texas. You just have to be willing to share your journey of taking one more step when it would have been easier to give up. Sometimes you're living your life having a story and you're using the plus one theory and you have no clue that you are doing that. I didn't All right, I didn't have any idea about a plus one theory when I was going through all the worst drama of my life, but I did put a name to it, just like I spoke of it earlier. I put a name to it and that's when everything started falling into place.

Speaker 1:

Listen, if you have a story and you think that you know the plus one theory was lived out through it, I'd love to hear it. You can go to Pam Dwyer dot com, go to the contact page and just fill out that little form and click submit. It'll shoot an email right to my box, my inbox, and then I'll you know we'll figure out a way to connect. I would love to hear your story, and we don't have to use your real name. If you're nervous about that, we can create a fictional one for you. I'd be honored to walk with you in the telling of it. So here's your plus one challenge for this week. You've got to take one small step toward reclaiming your energy. Tell one small part of your story and offer one ounce of grace to yourself or someone else. It really does feel good when you offer grace to someone else and to yourself.

Speaker 1:

Also, I have a monthly book giveaway. If you go to PamDwyerSpeakercom, you can click on the link there and sign up. All you do is put your email in there and it enters you into the giveaway, and every month. This month it's my book From the Piney Woods and I'm including a really awesome journal with it. So whoever the winner is for this month will get a From the Piney Woods signed edition and a beautiful journal, so you can start your journaling right away. So be sure to enter. And if you share it, guess what it enters you more times. Sharing it on Facebook. So any sure to enter. And if you share it, guess what it enters you more times. Sharing it on Facebook. So any type of social media. However you want to do it, but just share it and it helps me out. I'm trying my best to grow an email list so I can keep you guys updated. I am doing a lot, a lot of things to get this message out there and your help is so appreciated in doing that, and all you got to do is just type your email address and click enter.

Speaker 1:

And also there's the chapter chatter book club I started, where we feature incredible guests and real, raw stories that connect us all. And guess who the guests are? Whatever book we're reading, it's the author who better to answer your questions and discuss a book than the person that wrote it? And so I need there's a. If you go to pamdwirespeakercom, there's a link there to join the Chapter Chatter Book Club. It is remote, so no matter where you live or where you're at, you can attend the discussions. It's on YouTube Live and we stream it so you can come. You can attend the discussions. It's on YouTube live and we stream it so you can come in late, come in early, stay along with more questions. I just think it's wonderful, and so you should. You and your friends should take advantage of it, and it's also a good time to bond and to just meet new people.

Speaker 1:

Also, I've got well this one, if you're, if you know of anyone or any event that needs a speaker, guess what? I am a speaker and I can talk about all sorts of things, and you know what? I'm really good at Working with the event planner to make sure that we cover the topics. That is most needed for their audience, whoever that might be. Could be a workshop on the plus one theory, it could be just a 15 minute inspirational note to inspire the staff in your office, but I would love to spread the message of kindness, the message of the plus one, and how your past doesn't define you, it prepares you. There's so many ways to share those messages and I'd love to work with you.

Speaker 1:

So, again, just go to PamDwyercom and click on that contact form and submit a note to me saying hey, I have an event that you might want to consider speaking at. Or, better yet, what if you are talking to someone you know that plans and does events? You could say hey, if you ever need a speaker, I know of a great one. Her name's Pam Dwyer, and that would be your support for me. I need all of us to work together to get this message out there. And again, don't forget to sign up for my email list in any of those ways we just talked about, so you don't miss any updates, giveaways or moments of inspiration. Here's a final thought for everyone today, everybody has a story and your next chapter, it, starts with one step. Thanks for being here today. Stay kind, stay grounded and, as I always say, add a little more where it matters most.