The Plus One Theory
The Plus One Theory Podcast explores how small, intentional actions can create big, lasting impacts in our personal and professional lives. Each episode features inspiring guests sharing their experiences with kindness, resilience, and the transformative power of doing just one more—The Plus One Theory in action.
The Plus One Theory
Episode 16: Breaking Free From Imposter Syndrome
Have you ever caught yourself putting on a polished, professional voice that doesn't quite match who you really are? That's exactly where I found myself with this podcast—trying to sound "official" instead of authentic. Today's episode marks a turning point as I strip away the facade and speak directly from my heart about the imposter syndrome that affects 70% of us.
Growing up feeling invisible left me with a deep-seated belief that I needed to overcompensate, to give 150% when 100% would be enough. I've carried this pattern through life, constantly trying to prove my worthiness—even when recording this podcast. Through vulnerability and honesty, I share how this tendency to hide behind perfectionism actually disconnects us from the very people we hope to reach.
The Plus One Theory is about making small, intentional steps forward while being kind to yourself along the way. My plus one this week? Showing up as my real, unpolished self. I also share my vision for the upcoming Plus One Theory book, including an invitation for you to potentially share your story. Whether you're battling self-doubt, feeling stuck, or simply tired of wearing a mask, this episode offers permission to embrace your authentic self—because who you truly are is beautiful, worthy, and exactly what the world needs.
For those interested in sharing their stories or connecting further, email me at support@plusonepublishing.com or visit pamedwyer.com to join my community. Remember: your past doesn't define you—it prepares you for the meaningful impact only you can make.
Be a Guest on The Plus One Theory Podcast!
Are you someone who believes in the power of kindness, resilience, and intentional growth? Do you have a story about how small, meaningful steps have made a difference in your life or career?
I’d love to invite you to share your journey on The Plus One Theory Podcast!
This podcast is all about exploring how we can apply the Plus One Theory to create ripples of positivity and purpose in our personal and professional lives. I’m especially excited to feature guests who work in heart-centered careers—nurses, teachers, counselors, nonprofit leaders, caregivers, or anyone who dedicates their energy to helping others.
Your story could inspire listeners who are navigating their own challenges and looking for ways to take that next small step forward. Whether you’ve used kindness to overcome adversity, found strength in vulnerability, or applied intentional action to make an impact in your community, I want to hear from you!
Interested? Here’s How to Reach Out:
- Email me with a brief introduction about yourself and your story.
- Let me know how the Plus One Theory has played a role in your life or career.
Let’s work together to inspire others and create a ripple effect of kindness and resilience. I can’t wait to hear your story!
Share this with someone who inspires you...
Hey y'all. It's Pam Dwyer. If you're new here, welcome to the Plus One Theory podcast. I'm so glad you're listening today. Let me quickly explain what the Plus One Theory is all about. It's the idea that when you're doing your best, whatever that looks like today, you can always add just one small intentional step to move forward. It's not about pushing yourself to burnout. It's about growing with purpose, being kind to yourself and learning how small shifts can make a big impact over time. Also, just a quick disclaimer I'm not a therapist, a doctor or a clinical expert. I'm just someone who's been through some hard stuff, done a lot of healing, and now I get to share what I've learned with you. So always take what serves you and leave the rest. You and leave the rest. And if a friend sent you this episode or you're tuning in for the first time, you've come to the right place.
Speaker 1:Today we're diving into something that hits close to home what happens when we start to lose our real selves while trying to sound or act like someone we're not. So today I am challenged by those that love me and know me to try and sound more authentic. I've been trying too hard, I believe. So this is my confession to all of you today I've been using a voice that doesn't really sound like me, trying to sound official and polished, but it's just not coming across as authentic. I mean, I think it is. It's just. I think those that know me want to hear more from my heart, and so I'm going to do that from now on, and I'm truly sorry that I was so, I don't know, nervous or just those old feelings I had from my childhood, growing up. I just felt unworthy. You know I wanted to sound as professional and polished as possible, but the plus one theory it deserves a real voice because the message matters and that's the whole reason for me doing this, shouting from the mountaintop, so to speak, about how worthy we all are, how worthy you are, and if it reaches just one person and helps them realize that, then the world's a lot better, because the more of us that feel worthy and confident and realizes what our true strengths are, we can share them with others, and that's what I'm doing, that's what I'm trying to do. So I hope that each of these episodes touch your heart and hopefully helps you think of someone that could hear the message. You know we all need to work together as a team to help all those that need us. That's what we're here to do.
Speaker 1:So what's something in your life right now that you're over polishing? Where are you afraid to just be yourself? So I realized what I was describing. It's called. There is a name for it. It's called the imposter syndrome, and most people know what that is. It's like when you feel like a, like a fraud. Even when you're qualified and passionate about what you're doing, sharing or saying or being, we sometimes feel like we're not worthy of the recognition or of people hearing us or listening to us. Did you know that 70% I think I read about this once, 70% of people experience experience this imposter syndrome at some point. That's from Journal journal of behavioral science. It hits hardest when you're doing vulnerable, meaningful work, and women especially tend to feel this when they care deeply.
Speaker 1:So have you ever downplayed your gifts because you thought you weren't enough? Your gifts because you thought you weren't enough? I know we can all remember a time when that's happened. I've even done it. I have to tell you this, I've even. I just thought of this. I've even done it.
Speaker 1:I'm very familiar with how a car engine works and when it needs to have service. But it seems like every time I go and have the oil changed or a repair done, it's usually someone talking to me like I don't know anything and so I can correct them. I can let them know yes, I'm aware of that, and what about this, this, this and this? But instead I find that I just downplay it, my experience or my knowledge. I downplay it so that they feel better about what they are telling me. So I know it sounds crazy, but a lot of times I downplay what I know to be true, and I'm sure a lot of you have too.
Speaker 1:So lately, what I tend to do and the plus one is just instilled. It's instilled in me so deeply that it's hard sometimes for me to not go above and beyond and go that extra mile. Or instead of 100%, I want to give 150%. And through lots of therapy, I realized that that's my way of of saying okay, I know I'm not worthy enough to be doing this task and I know that I I don't feel like I'm qualified. So what I'm going to do is go above and beyond like do 150% so that you or anyone else will believe that I'm worthy to be doing or that I'm worth listening to or worth believing in my skill or in my behavior or in my advice, whatever that is, but it's because of the way I grew up. I grew up being invisible, I grew up not being seen or heard, and so therefore, I will struggle with that for the rest of my life. But I continue to educate myself, to learn to watch others, to love others, and when they don't want to let me love them, I try to find out why you know, and then somehow somehow let them know you're not letting me in because of this. I know what you're doing because I did it. So, yes, I am qualified and I am worthy to share my experiences with you, and hopefully my prayer is that you can glean anything from these stories and apply it to your own life.
Speaker 1:But even today, I tend to not take my own advice to be real, to remember all that I've learned with life choices and life disasters, and if we're not careful, we can be in a endless pattern of failure because we forget what we've learned or we just don't want to see what the truth is. I mean my whole the book that I wrote from the Piney Woods was a really scary thing for me. I mean, first of all, just putting my raw journal notes from counseling out for the world to read about. Those journal notes are my very private feelings, my honest, raw feelings and folks. I can't tell you enough how important journaling is because I would read them over and over, even a year or two down the road. I'd read what I was feeling and thinking at a year ago so I can remember now. Okay, I'm thinking this because of that. So it's a great reference for growth, because we're never completely cured healed, not cured but we're never completely healed. We're healed enough where we can tell ourselves okay, I realize what I'm doing right now and I need to stop it.
Speaker 1:So for the last week or so I've been feeling pretty discouraged because there are people that have been there for me and they continue to be there for me, supporting me mentally, financially, and they believe in me and my message that I want to just shout out to the world that your past doesn't define you, it prepares you and that's important, especially if you use the plus one theory alongside it. I'm in the process of writing a new book the plus one theory and right now I'm at a standstill. I'll be honest with all of you it's very expensive to invest in publishing a book, and that's not the hardest part. That's the critical part that you must do to put it out there so people can understand what the message is by reading it or listening to it. But it's a great investment financially and my husband, bless his heart, has been so supportive in that. But the last thing I want is for this just to be an expensive hobby. I want to put it in front of every person possible that needs to read it. It's not for everyone especially memoirs or autobiographies or self-help type books but it is for people out there that need it. But there's some people that just don't want to read something like that, and that's okay. But I want to put it out there for those that can benefit from the message.
Speaker 1:And so I'm struggling right now because I feel I feel stuck, and this podcast is for people that feel stuck. So I've been listening to each episode, from episode one on to this one, which is episode 16. And I heard what my family and friends were hearing. I'm like, wow, I do sound very professional. I could get a job at a radio station. So now I'm being real and that's what I'm going to do, whether I pronounce a word, properly or not. I'm just going to speak from my heart, and hopefully you can relate, and from what I'm sharing.
Speaker 1:And so what I'm going to share today is you are worthy. You are worthy of everything that you can possibly dream of, and there's always a way If you apply plus one, like that's what I'm having to do right now. I'm trying to figure out. So how can I not burden my husband and my family financially to accomplish this book, to get this book published? The plus one theory. And so I'm educating myself, I'm going out there and I'm learning. I'm learning so much.
Speaker 1:There's a lot of things that authors can do, especially when they're not, you know, financially set, but they have a message or a book in them, a story they want to get out there, and the best way you can do that is there is crowdfunding, it's called, and a lot of other options out there. And so I'm educating myself, I'm trying to learn. It's just like when I first published From the Piney Woods. What a disaster that was, with my impatient self. I published that book and winged it, and it was not what it should have been, and because of that, the message was not as powerful as it could have been. So, tim and I felt like the message was important enough and we invested in getting it professionally edited, professionally published, and now I have people in my life that I'm so thankful for that I have met through this whole effort, this whole process. They matter to me, they're important, and I know that this message is going to succeed. The book's going to succeed. It's going to be read by people that need it the most.
Speaker 1:So my story, my voice, my truth, that's what people connect with, and I need to remember that. Or you can remind me, please, please, submit reviews or suggestions. Even. I am all about growing from the advice of people that are listening, because if I'm not doing this well or not doing it in a way that helps people grow, then I need to learn how I can fix it. So please share with me, share with your friends.
Speaker 1:So this week I'm choosing to show up more real. That's my plus one this week, and why don't you share your plus one with me? By the way, that brings me to my next little idea, my book, the Plus One Theory. I've been changing the strategy of it for the message, for the theory to you know, and the best way people relate to an idea or a concept or a theory is with research and with proof and how they can apply it to their own lives. You know, what can they take away and use? And so I came up with this idea.
Speaker 1:I think that I'm going to talk with lots of people. I'm offering a chance for people to share their story and I'm going to put it in my book. I'm going to share real life stories of people that you know succeeded in life, but it was really difficult. Maybe the journey was tough, maybe it didn't end up the way they thought it would, you know, but if they have a story they want to share with the world, I am happy to put it in my book. So if you want to share something with me and I can write about it and include it in my book, we can use real names or we can use pretend names.
Speaker 1:It's up to you, but if you share that with me or you feel led to do that, please reach out to me. You can email me at support at plus one publishing dot com, and that plus P-L-U-S, the number one publishing P-U-B-L-I-S-H-I-N-G dot com. Email me and just let me know. Yes, pam, I have a story that I would love to share with you and we can do that together over coffee, tea, a meal. I can come to your, jump on your hamster wheel and meet you at your work, meet you at one of your kids games. I would love to cheer them on. However, we can communicate with one another, or maybe even just over the phone.
Speaker 1:All right, so what can we take away from this? Today, you have to admit your fear. That alone deflates it. So that's what I've been doing for myself all week. Is my fear? My fear is failing you, failing all those people that really need to hear that their past doesn't define them, that if they messed up, if they did something horrible, they can move beyond that. They can use it and use it for stepping stones to make a bigger impact in this world.
Speaker 1:Learn how to show kindness, learn how to give kindness. That's what empowers us, that's what gives us power, that energizes us when we are kind and be willing to be seen. Let people see the imperfect you, because then they're going to open up and feel like they can relate to you more. And, of course, always plus one, it One small step closer to being yourself and loving it. Loving yourself, loving all the things that make you different, because that's who you truly are, and you can celebrate the messy, messy middle. That's where the growth lies. We grow from our mistakes. We learn from our mistakes. We become stronger, wiser and more able to help others.
Speaker 1:So who are you when you're not trying to impress anyone? When you're not trying to impress anyone, maybe when you're sitting alone somewhere outside having a meal or just laying in the bed at night trying to get to sleep? Who are you at that moment when no one can hear you, no one can see you? That's who you truly are and that's who we deserve to see and know. That's who I want to know. I want to know the real you and it's who we deserve to see and know. That's who I want to know. I want to know the real you, and it's only fair that I give you the real me, and I have been. It's just I don't know. I've been trying to be better than what I felt I was.
Speaker 1:So I promise no more podcasting behind a mask. You're just going to get the real, pam, and so let's do this together. Let's do life real not polished, not perfect, but real, because who we are is beautiful. So share this with someone who's battling self-doubt and sometimes we battle it self-doubt and no one realizes it. No one realizes it. They just think that we're moody or in a bad mood or we're just not approachable or vulnerable or open for connection. And all we have to do is just feel better about ourselves and forgive ourselves if we must. If we need to do that, we must forgive ourselves first so that we can forgive others.
Speaker 1:So you can join my email list at pamedwyercom to stay connected. I know everyone hates getting emails out, but I promise it's the best way for us to stay connected. There's so many social media outlets y'all. I don't know if any of you rely on social media to grow your business or your company or your job. That man. There's so many and people all use. Some people use Instagram, some people love Facebook, some people hate Facebook and TikTok don't get me started. I haven't even I can't even begin to think about getting on TikTok, but people tell me that it's very useful. But everyone emails Everyone. I've never known anyone not to have an email address. So if you share that with me, all I'm going to do is share when I write about any of these things.
Speaker 1:The plus one theory you can learn about the process of my writing. You can learn when we plan to release the book and celebrate it. You can celebrate with me and grow with me. It's very exciting, and so, on this journey, maybe you have a book in you, maybe you have a story you want to share, so you can learn from my mistakes. That would make me very happy Also. So pamedwyercom is the way to stay connected with me. Just just put that email address in there and make sure that I'm not spammed. Don't spam, pam. Oh, I just made that up, but anyway, I do have the special announcement. I mentioned it briefly earlier, but I'm currently doing research for my next book of the plus one theory and I want to interview people who have powerful stories that reflect the heart of the plus one theory.
Speaker 1:Doing just one extra thing made a meaningful difference in your life and you'd like to be featured in the book as a success story real name or fictional. Reach out to me. I'd love to hear your journey and even if we don't put it in the book, I still want to hear it. You can email me. You can find me on any social media outlet. Most of them are under Pam Dwyer Speaker. So if you're not sure what to search for, you can always find me under Pam Dwyer, speaker. And why is that? Because I'm trying to get out into the world of speaking.
Speaker 1:I've never felt so on fire about anything than speaking to an audience that need to inspire them, motivate them, educate them, teach them how to apply all these wonderful things. The plus one theory and the past doesn't define you, it prepares you how to use any painful past as energy and power to succeed and make a difference. Now, that came from the heart. But if you know of anyone, if you work at a company that has speakers, hey, raise your hand and say I know of someone. Her name is Pam Dwyer and she speaks about amazing messages that we could all use. Or maybe you know someone that is in event planning and they need a speaker. The cool thing about me is that I'm not famous and I haven't done a lot of speaking, so I'm pretty cheap y'all. So if you're on a tight budget and you need an amazing, inspirational, motivational speaker, pamdwyercom is where you need to go. All right, y'all, I'll see you next week. Let's keep it real, keep it kind and always add a little more to make life a lot better.